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Scotty

Neurotically moaning my way around the world I aim to experience as much as I can and escape traditional British living. Travelling with my best friend Thomo (I hate him really), I hope to share my experiences with you, while constantly ripping on Ian and belittling myself. Should make for some fun times. (Circa 2012)Now older, fatter & somewhat wiser, I find myself sucked back into the 9-5 grind. With new responsibilities, but a never dwindling love for travel, I strive to regain the life I wanted, with my son and partner in toe...........is it possible to get the prefect mix? We shall see. (April 2017)

Behind Every Door Is a Lucky Thomson

Ok so no need for me to give you a rundown of the day’s events (nor will I mention Thomo’s disgusting LUCKY streak on the pool table) but I just wanted to reiterate that despite it being a one day stopover in Bangkok we actually had a fairly successful day for us. We manage to get clean….an instant bonus for u there, we managed to replace our missing, disregarded, abandoned, lost or whatever you want …

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Diamonds Are Forever, But Jewels Are For Fools

I’m sure our Aussie friend Dundee won’t mind me telling this story as it could be for the greater good (i.e. stop someone out there being as dumb as he was). Through Sean we have come to learn of a scam going on in Bangkok. The exact ins and outs are not completely known to us but we can give you enough info to avoid it. The gist is based around buying gems. There are …

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Tender Tummy Thomo

As I write this I am pretty sure I’m listening to the scene from American Pie where ‘Shit Break’ has been given some laxatives. Thomo’s gippy stomach has now meant that every time he eats he instantly needs to go to the toilet and drop the contents of his bowels along with what sounds like a balloon full of air. Apologies for being so graphic but as our room is so small it is impossible …

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Our First Proper Day In Vientiane…..Buddha Park.

After a fairly lazy afternoon/evening the day before (because we were still feeling ropey) we thought we had actually get off our asses and achieve something today. Luckily for us we have complimentary breakfast with our room, which is good seen as it is the most expensive room we have paid out for so far at 650 Kip each (around £6). The breakfast is pretty standard, consisting of a choice of omelette, fried eggs or …

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No Spring Chickens

It’s fair to say that were not quite as young as we still think we are. That’s not to say we are actually old, more that we act like we should be getting our first chest hairs and seeing real life nude women for the first time (ok so maybe that one happened to me last week!!!). Either way among the many people we have met they have shaved a few years off our actual …

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Behind With The Times…But Welcome To Laos

Ok so it appears I have neglected to write anything for a while and Ian has monopolised the writing. It would be easy for me to make up some excuse like’ he is a loser and spends all the time on the internet’ where as I am socialising, but the realistic fact would be I have just completely forgotten! That’s not to say I haven’t been preoccupied with ‘something’ else but that would be another …

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Chiang Mai Jungle Trek Part Deux

The next day was a bit nicer for the elephants as we walked them down to the river and bathed them, which they really seemed to enjoy, one more so than the others as he farted on Grainne’s leg and then stood up and crapped next to her…….genius. Probably the two best parts of the 2 days came up next, visiting a waterfall with a natural slide into a deep pool, there is actually a …

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Chiang Mai Jungle Trek Part One

As part of our time in Chiang Mai we decided to do a jungle trek, mostly because the hostel we were staying at offered us a really good deal. This included getting a room for 100 baht each a night (£2) and the trek for 1100 Baht (around £22). This not only included the activities, but also lunch for 2 days, dinner for the one night, breakfast in the morning and a bed in the …

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Immunisations & Malaria

Having been named ‘sick boy’ by Thomo, it seems only right I talk a bit about Malaria and a quick re cap on Immunisations, I know I touched on them before: https://www.livefreedietravelling.com/travel/time-to-kill/ If anyone is going to get something, it won’t be that spawney twat. Before leaving we went for a whole host of immunisation, some free on the NHS and some not. Here is a list:   Tetanus, Diphtheria & Polio – free Combined …

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Half Moon Half Toe!!!!!!

With a fairly decent hangover, or as we have been informed ‘Changover’, the day of the Half Moon party had arrived. Hair of the dog and a Burmese curry probably wasn’t the best way to start my day but I’m pretty sure it was the afternoon by the time we reached the restaurant/pool so it was a fairly guilt free breakfast!!! The Coral Bungalows isn’t exactly the traveller’s rest bite and its fair to say …

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Three Weeks Down…

and we definitely don’t miss….. 1/ British food 2/ Chavs 3/ Shit Weather 4/ Boredom 5/ Cost of British/European Living 6/Words Like ‘innit’ (I use the fact I called that a ‘word’ loosely)   Things we are adjusting to….! 1/ Increasingly fuzzy and curly hair 2/ How the diet comes out the other end (to be fair this now seems to have sorted itself out)! 3/ Climate 4/ Cheap beer and spirits…….don’t get us wrong …

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Beds, Beards and Bartos!

So among all what we are hoping is useful information it’s always good to have a pile of nonsense just to give you little insights into the kind of idiots we are! First of all Ian seems to getting beaten with the lethargy stick pretty hard and so often he can be seen lying on beaches, floors and basically anywhere looking for a quick snooze. This is undoubtedly due to the heat (having a Haribo …

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This Is My Hammock, There Are Many Like It But This One Is Mine!!!!!

The trip from Koh Samui to Koh Tao is pretty easy. The boat takes a little while, say 1 hour maximum from Koh Samui to Koh Phanang and 2 hour maximum from Koh Phanang to Koh Tao. There are quicker ways of doing this as you can get a faster boat which goes direct (no Koh Phanang stop) but this costs 750 Baht (£15) per person, as opposed to the 420 Baht (around £8.40) we …

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My Reoccurring Dream

I’m no psychologist, as much as I’d like to think I am (and sometimes I do), but I’m pretty sure my warped OCD ridden, puerile mind can actually work this one out. I keep having a reoccurring dream that for some reason I have to fly back to England. I must have had this around 4 times now. One time it has been because I had to work for two more days and then I …

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Jeep, Pizza & Thai Kick Boxing

As the evening drew in we took to our hut to chill out with a classic past time of ours, watching stupid YouTube clips and having a beer. Got to recommend this… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSEYXWmEse8 It gets better the further in you go. Was loving the Napoleon Dynamite one, the simple stupid ones are the best! Anyway we were due to be picked up tonight by Nelly (our new French friend) and her friends Jeff, Alexander and …

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Khaosan Road, Ping Pong Show And The London Lady Killer Part 2

Right I’ve been assigned to take over part two of this, mainly because I saw more of the ping pong show than Ian. You can make your own minds up whether the reasoning is I’m more perverted or Ian’s sexuality may be in question!!! So from eating the crickets we started to trek back down Khaosam road, a bit of an aimless wonder at this point but then we started to hear the familiar noise …

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Crab vs Bull

Today we had breakfast (and sliming vanity driven fruit smoothie for Ian and an attempted healthy but gone wrong somewhere, pineapple pancake with honey) and followed it with a very bromantic stroll down the beach….just to give you an insight into what we talk about, we were discussing who would win in a fight between a crab (of large size) and a bull, as I was laughing at Lee Evan’s joke about how hard a …

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