I’m no psychologist, as much as I’d like to think I am (and sometimes I do), but I’m pretty sure my warped OCD ridden, puerile mind can actually work this one out.
I keep having a reoccurring dream that for some reason I have to fly back to England. I must have had this around 4 times now. One time it has been because I had to work for two more days and then I was going to fly back out here again and last night’s was that Ian had run out of money and we flew back to Loughborough and had to wait for him to earn some money so we could fly back out (even though that would make no sense as it would cost a load to fly back to England and back out here again).
My reckoning to this dream is a fear that something is going to mean/make me have to go back even though I really don’t want to. I am imagining it is a hard concept for my mind to grasp that this is a long term thing as it is so used to being in that part of the world, the part it considers to be the norm, or even what it perceives to be home, and is perhaps struggling with this.
At no point in these dreams have I felt a happy sensation to have arrived back and there is a feeling driving me within the dream to get back out travelling again. Whether this is due to the short span of time I have been here and the knowledge there is so much to do, or whether it is a realisation that even though I was aware I was unhappy with my life the way it was back home, lets say unfulfilled and monotonous, I was in fact a lot more unhappy than I had cared to investigate.
Boom, some inner psychological analysis of myself there. Enjoy, criticise or even laugh at, do what you want with it.
Love Scotty x